Weaseling out of things is important to learn. It’s what separates us from the animals…except the weasel. You know, the one with all the well meaning rules that don’t work out in real life, uh, Christianity. Bart, with $10,000 we’d be millionaires! We could buy all kinds of useful things like…love! Son, when you participate in sporting events, it’s not whether you win or lose: it’s how drunk you get. Inflammable means flammable? What a country.

Uh, no, you got the wrong number. This is 9-1…2. Homer no function beer well without. I stand by my racial slur. Son, a woman is like a beer. They smell good, they look good, you’d step over your own mother just to get one! But you can’t stop at one. You wanna drink another woman! They only come out in the night. Or in this case, the day. I like my beer cold, my TV loud and my homosexuals flaming.

No children have ever meddled with the Republican Party and lived to tell about it. Homer no function beer well without. Ahoy hoy? We started out like Romeo and Juliet, but it ended up in tragedy. Oh, loneliness and cheeseburgers are a dangerous mix. Get ready, skanks! It’s time for the truth train!

Books are useless! I only ever read one book, “To Kill A Mockingbird,” and it gave me absolutely no insight on how to kill mockingbirds! Sure it taught me not to judge a man by the color of his skin…but what good does *that* do me? I’m a Spalding Gray in a Rick Dees world. You don’t win friends with salad. The Internet King? I wonder if he could provide faster nudity…

Aw, you’re all Mr. Grumpy Face today. Did I mention we have comfy chairs? Stop talking, brain thinking. Hush.

You hit me with a cricket bat. I am the Doctor, and you are the Daleks! I hate yogurt. It’s just stuff with bits in. It’s a fez. I wear a fez now. Fezes are cool.

I hate yogurt. It’s just stuff with bits in. Sorry, checking all the water in this area; there’s an escaped fish. Saving the world with meals on wheels. Stop talking, brain thinking. Hush. Annihilate? No. No violence. I won’t stand for it. Not now, not ever, do you understand me?! I’m the Doctor, the Oncoming Storm – and you basically meant beat them in a football match, didn’t you? The way I see it, every life is a pile of good things and bad things.…hey.…the good things don’t always soften the bad things; but vice-versa the bad things don’t necessarily spoil the good things and make them unimportant.

I’m the Doctor, I’m worse than everyone’s aunt. *catches himself* And that is not how I’m introducing myself. Heh-haa! Super squeaky bum time! Sorry, checking all the water in this area; there’s an escaped fish. I’m the Doctor, I’m worse than everyone’s aunt. *catches himself* And that is not how I’m introducing myself. Sorry, checking all the water in this area; there’s an escaped fish.

I am the last of my species, and I know how that weighs on the heart so don’t lie to me! Stop talking, brain thinking. Hush. You know when grown-ups tell you ‘everything’s going to be fine’ and you think they’re probably lying to make you feel better?

Aw, you’re all Mr. Grumpy Face today. All I’ve got to do is pass as an ordinary human being. Simple. What could possibly go wrong? Aw, you’re all Mr. Grumpy Face today.

It’s a fez. I wear a fez now. Fezes are cool. Annihilate? No. No violence. I won’t stand for it. Not now, not ever, do you understand me?! I’m the Doctor, the Oncoming Storm – and you basically meant beat them in a football match, didn’t you? I’m nobody’s taxi service; I’m not gonna be there to catch you every time you feel like jumping out of a spaceship. Did I mention we have comfy chairs? All I’ve got to do is pass as an ordinary human being. Simple. What could possibly go wrong?

You know when grown-ups tell you ‘everything’s going to be fine’ and you think they’re probably lying to make you feel better? It’s a fez. I wear a fez now. Fezes are cool. You’ve swallowed a planet! It’s a fez. I wear a fez now. Fezes are cool.

You know how I sometimes have really brilliant ideas? I’m the Doctor. Well, they call me the Doctor. I don’t know why. I call me the Doctor too. I still don’t know why. I’m the Doctor. Well, they call me the Doctor. I don’t know why. I call me the Doctor too. I still don’t know why. Father Christmas. Santa Claus. Or as I’ve always known him: Jeff. Father Christmas. Santa Claus. Or as I’ve always known him: Jeff.

You know how I sometimes have really brilliant ideas? I hate yogurt. It’s just stuff with bits in. Heh-haa! Super squeaky bum time! The way I see it, every life is a pile of good things and bad things.…hey.…the good things don’t always soften the bad things; but vice-versa the bad things don’t necessarily spoil the good things and make them unimportant.

You know when grown-ups tell you ‘everything’s going to be fine’ and you think they’re probably lying to make you feel better? I am the Doctor, and you are the Daleks! No… It’s a thing; it’s like a plan, but with more greatness. Father Christmas. Santa Claus. Or as I’ve always known him: Jeff. *Insistently* Bow ties are cool! Come on Amy, I’m a normal bloke, tell me what normal blokes do!

*Insistently* Bow ties are cool! Come on Amy, I’m a normal bloke, tell me what normal blokes do! Heh-haa! Super squeaky bum time! You know how I sometimes have really brilliant ideas? Did I mention we have comfy chairs? I am the Doctor, and you are the Daleks! I’m the Doctor, I’m worse than everyone’s aunt. *catches himself* And that is not how I’m introducing myself.

All I’ve got to do is pass as an ordinary human being. Simple. What could possibly go wrong? It’s a fez. I wear a fez now. Fezes are cool. Stop talking, brain thinking. Hush.

I hate yogurt. It’s just stuff with bits in. I’m nobody’s taxi service; I’m not gonna be there to catch you every time you feel like jumping out of a spaceship. You hit me with a cricket bat.

1. Saving the world with meals on wheels.
2. You know how I sometimes have really brilliant ideas?
3. The way I see it, every life is a pile of good things and bad things.…hey.…the good things don’t always soften the bad things; but vice-versa the bad things don’t necessarily spoil the good things and make them unimportant.
4. It’s a fez. I wear a fez now. Fezes are cool.

*Insistently* Bow ties are cool! Come on Amy, I’m a normal bloke, tell me what normal blokes do! You hate me; you want to kill me! Well, go on! Kill me! KILL ME! No… It’s a thing; it’s like a plan, but with more greatness.

Annihilate? No. No violence. I won’t stand for it. Not now, not ever, do you understand me?! I’m the Doctor, the Oncoming Storm – and you basically meant beat them in a football match, didn’t you? It’s art! A statement on modern society, ‘Oh Ain’t Modern Society Awful?’! Stop talking, brain thinking. Hush.

Heh-haa! Super squeaky bum time! Father Christmas. Santa Claus. Or as I’ve always known him: Jeff. *Insistently* Bow ties are cool! Come on Amy, I’m a normal bloke, tell me what normal blokes do! Father Christmas. Santa Claus. Or as I’ve always known him: Jeff. I hate yogurt. It’s just stuff with bits in. No… It’s a thing; it’s like a plan, but with more greatness.